So – and you say, as a fat woman, you’re not supposed to take up space. And you also write, (reading) I’m not comfortable in my body. GROSS: …(Reading) I’m a feminist, and I believe in doing away with the rigid beauty standards that force women to conform to unrealistic standards. It looks sort of brutal in the transcript, all that (LAUGHTER), but if you listen, it’s not. The Venn diagram of my trolls would be a circle. GROSS: They hate you because you’re black and feminist and fat? GROSS: Is there any percent where it’s, like, all three? GROSS: I love that you have it broken down into percentages. And 30 percent of my trolling is because I’m fat. Thirty percent of my trolling is because I’m black. Like, I would say 40 percent of my trolling is because I’m a feminist. GROSS: So when you’re trolled on the internet and social media, do you think that has to do at all with describing yourself as a feminist? Because there’s so much, like, anti-feminist trolling. And so I try not to make myself that kind of a target as often as possible. I hate doing television not because I’m on television but because when I go on TV, the amount of hate mail and the amount of trolling I get on social media is unbearable. And I actually do enjoy doing these events and connecting with audiences because I have a really passionate audience.
GAY: Oh, it’s – you know, I’m afraid of public speaking, so I’ve had to learn how to do it. You know, one of the many reasons I’m a writer is because I didn’t want to be, like, an actor on a stage or on the screen. And, you know, you travel all over, giving speeches. GROSS: I suppose writing gives you that, too – the ability to say what you want and have people look at your work without looking physically at you. It was the – I had – the best memories I have of high school and the first two years of college are connected to theater.
And technical theater allowed me that space. But theater is where I found my passion in being behind the scenes because I didn’t want to be seen. I did them because that’s what you do to get into a good college. And so I was never really interested in extracurriculars. It was a way of being a part of something because I’m not a joiner. Was that a way of being involved with storytelling and with people but also being kind of invisible because you were literally offstage? You went to Yale, in part, because of their theater department. I guess earlier than that you fell in love with theater. GROSS: So when you were in college, you fell in love with theater. Terry Gross talked to Roxane Gay yesterday.